Metal detecting: Too much of a competition?

I am a very competitive person and always want to be the best at something. I want the most coppers, most silvers, oldest finds, most valuable finds and so on. Of course one person could never be the champion of all those categories but it's something I try to do. Unfortunately this leads to jealously which takes away from enjoying other people's finds and instead makes me wish they didn't find them at all. This is not the right way to go about the hobby and it's been something I've been trying to work on especially this year. I need to just be happy for what I found and be glad for others rather than envy them

Hope it goes well for you. I feel if you place that kind of pressure on your self to always have the best of finds in all ways, then it will take away your enjoyment of this great hobby. And yes I also envy other people's find but I enjoy reading about them also. I also believe that someday it will be me that people look at with envy when they see what I found. Hasn't happened yet but I have faith that it will happen

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Honestly jim, maybe the hobby isn't the best for you if you think that way. Someone will always have a rarer, more of something, more valuable find, etc. but you got a gold coin, which is a dream find for everyone including me so you shouldn't complain hh

Jim, we all get jealous and envy other people's finds, but if it's happening to a degree where you feel like you don't enjoy the hobby, then maybe metal detecting isn't for you.

I don't really have any advice for you other than try private property sites or old homesites that haven't been heavily picked over alike some of your public spots.

Jim , this is a pretty common feeling to have especially when detecting with a group of friends . everyone wants to have that great or awesome coin or relic and it does happen but usually in turns , one weekend it might be Isaac's with a sweet coin and then Sam the next weekend with a great relic . Be Patient it will come around to you , the bad or negative thoughts (I believe in by the way) can affect your detecting or "luck" out come .

I once went 7 months with out finding a copper , you talk about some serious doubts about what i was doing wrong and negative thoughts , I was pretty discouraged to even go out at one point. staying positive is very important Jim , be genuinely happy for your friends finds after all they saved some history from maybe never seeing the light of day . Your day will happen just have a little patience my friend .

Dan

I believe we all struggle with this to differing degrees. I hunt with friends all the time and usually feel joy and wonder at their great finds. But on a few occasions I have felt jealousy and envy which always poisoned my mood and ruined my hunt. I guess I'm saying the same thing as Dan. Every dog has his day. And when my friends hit something good I try to place myself in their shoes and thereby am able share in their good fortune.

I've been going through a nasty slump lately. I know I'm gonna eventually break out of it but sometimes it really puts me in a negative attitude. I just gotta keep swinging and hope for the best

Jim a slump with bring out the worst thoughts and feelings and it will only compound bad outings , being positive and optimistic before a hunt can make all the difference to your outcome goals and to the friends around you .

Dan

Recognizing your problems are the first step to curing them .

Can you really use the argument about detecting these items is better than leaving them to rot away in the ground, if you are going to think it's a competition?
I'll kind of chalk this up to age, altho Isaac is younger than you. When I started a professional job I was seeing people who were there 20-30+ years not knowing how to perform their job and here I am just getting my feet wet and I could do better. I was a bit cocky but I eventually calmed down.
We've all had times tho when we get jealous. I'll admit that I was jealous when we got a home site to hunt and it was really old. He pulled up a silver ring and a few wheats already, then goes over an area I went over too hastily. It was near a walkway which I should have gone real slow. Up came a barber half. I hadn't found anything by that point and it was an area I just checked. I eventually got 2 mercs from the property, tho. There is absolutely no way you, just one person, will be able to cover all the ground that hides these things. That's why it's best to enjoy what others pull up and try enjoying any company you may get. I can only send so many invites out, but a lack of committal just make me want wait instead to get invitations sent my way.

If you're hunting with friends in the same places and you're NEVER the guy with the "best find",either your setup is off or you're just in a huge slump. It's nice to find good coins,it's what we do. I don't go out thinking" hey,I wanna find a shitty coin". Watch Jeff(firefighter43) do some of his videos. He doesn't come away EVERY time with lots of loot,sometimes he does well. He has 3 things in particular going for him,not LUCK based. First,a top notch machine. Second, sites with high potential for old coins. Lastly,a lot of experience. Combine these things and surely something will happen sooner or later. You can get lucky and wave your Bounty Hunter over a manhole cover and find a seated half stuck to the top of it....chances are terrible this is going to happen. The frustration of not finding what you're looking for should be the driving force behind you as a hunter developing those skills,saving the change for an updated unit or better coil.....finding better sites with more potential! There's nothing wrong with being competitive,it's a lot easier to be a good sport when you "win" sometimes. What's it gonna take for you to do more winning?
The other day my buddy and I were getting our asses handed to us on a plate. I suggested we go rut around an area I had found a LC 2 years ago,a public park....we had found nothing else of note there since then. Would you FREEEEKIN BELEEEEEVE he got a screaming 00-29 signal,not too far down. He thought it might be a half of 2 quarters. I said,no,not on my Explorer,as I swept it before he dug. A half would not read that way. He pops out a fairly large dirty coin,bigger than a quarter,not as big as a half. It was an 1855 LC!! I was the biggest cheerleader ever right then,the sight of something that old in hand at that moment was the biggest thrill for both of us,and the fact I had one already(1852) and he didn't until then made it a truly memorable moment. I found nothing that day,but came home and had a huge grin as I told my wife and kids about it,finding one of those in WI is NOT easy these days! WE had accomplished the seemingly impossible,I directed the hunt TO the site,HE had the good fortune to sweep it. It's about the shared fortune of you and your fellow hunters,and being able to see the coin for what it is,not whose it is. Of course,as stated,this is easier when everyone is finding stuff at about an equal rate. Changing a setting at a certain site can be the answer,maybe your machine is funky,who knows. Whatever you do,persevere. It's the only way in this hobby.

HH
Kevin

Great philosophy Kevin! Hard part is believing someone found a LC in a Wisconsin park, much less 2 being in the same park! Heck, Wisconsin didn't even get it's statehood until 1848!

Um. Look at the hobby as a saying I made up......Life is a journey to be savoured not a race to be won!